TRUE STORY: ADOPTION

In the summer of 2016, our family started the process to become licensed foster parents in the state of Wyoming.  We had done something similar in Nebraska and when we moved to Wyoming took a bit of a break to get settled.  Once we were settled, we talked to our kids and as a family decided to move forward.  The process for becoming foster parents required home visits, interviews, background checks, and classes.  Once we were done with that process, it was time to wait for a call from DFS. 

Our plan was to be foster parents.  Jon and I both come from a place of wanting to see families strengthened and reunification happen.  We had gotten to see this over and over while in Nebraska and celebrated the times that relationships were healed, and youth could go back home.  We knew our girls’ parents very well, they spent holiday meals with us, we talked to them regularly, and we wanted their families to succeed. 

During the licensing process, one of the questions we were asked was “who would fit best in your home?”  The answer, for us, was simple- teenage girls!  During our time in Nebraska, we grew to love our time spent with them and missed the dynamic that having older girls brought.  We knew that teenagers typically had a more difficult time finding foster homes and we wanted to provide a place where they were wanted.

On November 16, we received our report that said we were licensed and while I was reading the report, I got a phone call from DFS. The voice on the other end told me that there was a 7-year-old whose permanency plan included adoption and asked us to consider that.  This was a shock.  We had gone into foster care with the idea that we would not adopt.  The other important part of the call was that we needed to call back in the morning to give our answer.  When my husband got home from work, we did a lot of talking and even more praying and November 17 we called and said “yes”.   That weekend we met our daughter and the next weekend she started spending weekends with us.  We did that for 3 weekends and then she moved in for good on December 9, 2016.  

The process of adopting our daughter included the mandatory 6 months that we had to foster her as part of her permanency plan.  Through that process there were certainly ups and downs.  It can feel a bit like trying to navigate a new road while blindfolded.  Thankfully, we were committed to our daughter and despite some delays, we were able to celebrate her adoption on August 23, 2017.  It hit me while we were planning our party that from the day, we learned about her to the day we finalized her adoption, the process had taken 9 months.  The same amount of time that we had waited for our two older kids.  Nine months. 

It’s been three and a half years since we met our daughter, almost three since her adoption was finalized.  As time passes, some things get easier; for example, we know each other better, she knows holiday traditions, she has met most of the important people in our lives, she is familiar with rules and expectations, and she has made big gains in school and in therapy.  She loves to tell people that she is adopted, and she knows she is loved, and she is safe.